Raising Trilingual Kids: A Parent's Guide

A German-born parent living in the Netherlands is raising their children to speak three languages: German, Dutch, and English. The family employs a strict "one parent, one language" approach to ensure consistency. While the children are immersed in Dutch daily, the parents actively cultivate German and English skills through reading, media, and travel.

The mother, who grew up traveling internationally, credits her own experiences for her desire to raise multilingual children. The family's strategy involves specific roles: the mother speaks German, the father speaks Dutch, and English is introduced through fun, interactive methods. The children, aged 4 and 6, are already fluent in German and Dutch and understand a significant amount of English.

The journey toward raising multilingual children began with the mother's own international upbringing. Born in Germany, she felt she did not belong there from a young age. At 11 years old, she persuaded her parents to send her abroad for a summer school experience in Eastbourne, England. This trip in June 1994 was a turning point, exposing her to diverse cultures and languages.

Following that experience, she pursued a life of travel. After finishing school and university, she backpacked in Australia for a year. She subsequently worked in Dublin and later secured a job in Amsterdam. In 2014, she became an entrepreneur and lived as a digital nomad for 3.5 years, traveling across Asia, Europe, and South America. This background set the stage for her decision to settle in the Netherlands and marry her Dutch husband.

To manage three languages, the parents adopted a specific methodology. The core rule they learned was to be consistent and clear. They adhere to the "one parent, one language" principle, which helps children associate a specific language with a specific person, reducing confusion. The mother speaks German to the children, while the father speaks Dutch.

Living in the Netherlands presents a challenge: the children hear Dutch everywhere, but German is not naturally part of their environment. Consequently, the mother takes on the "heavy lifting" to ensure German fluency. She began speaking German to her children while pregnant and continued exclusively after their birth. To reinforce this, the family:

• Reads books to them daily in both German and Dutch.
• Engages in video calls with German-speaking grandparents.
• Travels to Germany regularly to visit family.
• Listens to German podcasts for children during travel.

These trips force the children to speak German to relatives who do not understand Dutch.

English was introduced when the children were 2 years old. The parents made the learning process fun rather than academic. They utilized English-language books and television shows, such as "Peppa Pig". The mother noted that it took some time before her daughter even realized she was hearing a different language, demonstrating the adaptability of young brains.

In addition to media, the family uses the LingoKids app, an interactive tool designed to teach everyday English skills through games and videos. The mother occasionally holds short conversations in English with the children, particularly when they ask questions. As the children grow and begin learning English in school, these conversations will increase to solidify it as their natural third language. Reflecting on the process, the mother stated that if she could start over, she would introduce spoken English more actively at an earlier stage.

Raising children with three languages requires significant effort and unwavering consistency, particularly when the target language is not the community language. By combining the "one parent, one language" rule with immersive reading, digital tools, and cultural travel, this family has successfully nurtured a multilingual environment. Their children, aged 4 and 6, are already navigating German, Dutch, and English with ease, a testament to the effectiveness of their structured yet playful approach.