Brooklyn Beckham Family Feud: When to Set Boundaries

The Beckham family, long a fixture of celebrity culture, has become the center of a public discussion on family dynamics. Brooklyn Peltz Beckham, 26, recently confirmed speculation of a feud with his parents, David and Victoria Beckham, via his Instagram story. He stated he is no longer seeking reconciliation with them, but rather "peace, privacy and happiness for us and our future family."

This high-profile family implosion has prompted many to question their own relationships with parents. For those wondering if it is time to establish boundaries, a family therapist has identified one major sign to watch for. The decision to set limits is often necessary when a relationship begins to erode one's fundamental identity.

Speculation regarding the rift began in May 2024, following David Beckham's 50th birthday celebration. The former footballer shared photos from the event on Instagram that notably did not include Brooklyn or his wife, Nicola Peltz Beckham. The absence fueled rumors of a disconnect within the family.

Tensions appeared to escalate in December 2024. Brooklyn's younger brother, Cruz Beckham, 20, addressed the situation publicly. He denied that his parents had unfollowed Brooklyn on the social media platform, claiming instead that he and his parents had been blocked by Brooklyn.

In his recent Instagram story, Brooklyn made a series of allegations against his parents, including matters related to his 2022 wedding. Neither Brooklyn nor his parents, David and Victoria Beckham, have immediately responded to requests for comment regarding these specific claims.

Shruti Jain, a London-based family therapist, explains that clients frequently bring up the topic of setting boundaries with parents. She identifies the critical indicator that limits are needed: when the relationship undermines your core sense of self.

"The work that I do as a family therapist is to understand when you start disconnecting with your core self," Jain said. "The core self is the person you are: a person who says, 'I love the color blue,' and 'I love to eat at this restaurant,' and 'I'm not a morning person.'"

Over time, growing up in family systems where these beliefs, values, and preferences are repeatedly questioned can erode a person's identity. This can happen through overt behaviors, such as gaslighting or emotional abuse, or through more subtle patterns like persistent criticism or questioning of a child's likes and dislikes.

Jain notes that this disconnection often leads to questioning the people around you. "Boundaries need to be established when your core sense of self, values, and beliefs become questionable," she advises.

Establishing boundaries is not synonymous with ending a relationship. Charlotte Baden-Powell, a London-based integrative psychotherapist, notes that boundaries often create necessary "space for reflection, differentiation, understanding, and integration."

This distance allows both parents and adult children to gain perspective outside the family system. Over time, this can lead to healthier relationships. In many cases, relationships resume in a different, more sustainable form.

However, boundaries are sometimes necessary for psychological safety. In some instances, relationships may end where continued contact would be psychologically harmful. This is particularly true if only one family member has taken the opportunity to reflect and develop their perspective.

Therapists emphasize that setting boundaries is a protective measure for one's mental health. It involves reminding yourself that you are not harming your parents by prioritizing your well-being. It also requires resisting the urge to placate them when their mood changes in response to your limits.

The process of differentiation—separating one's identity from the family unit—is a natural part of adulthood. When family dynamics prevent this separation, professional guidance can be invaluable. The goal is to move from a state of disconnection to one of authentic self-possession.

The Beckham family situation highlights a universal struggle: balancing family loyalty with personal identity. While public feuds are rare, the underlying issues of boundaries and self-worth are common.

Recognizing the signs of a relationship that undermines your core self is the first step toward change. Whether the outcome is a redefined relationship or a necessary distance, the objective is to preserve one's peace and psychological health.